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Episode 18
Older Me meets Younger Me Laura Giammona There are many instances when I wished the older me could have counseled the younger me. I was vulnerable many a times, and if the older me could have just told the younger me that it would all be okay. If the older me could have held the younger mes hand, even for just a little while... to give her courage and hope. I would have told her how truly special she was. I would have told to her to go for it. I would have told her she was worth so much more than she was feeling. I would have told her that she would one day sing. I was given the chance to visit the younger me on this tour. I dont think the little girl knew it, and in fact I didnt know it until I was driving away from Springfield, MO, the next day. Let me start by saying that a show is not complete if I do not get a chance to meet some of the audience members. As a performer, I strive to connect with the listeners as they are as much of the performance as I. It is the exchange of energy between the listener and performer that is so powerful, inspirational, and addictive (in a positive way). Anyway, on this particular night, while working our merchandise table I met many wonderful people. Two people who had lived in Missoula, Montana (my hometown) at one time, which always puts me in the best of moods. In fact, one gentleman was even wearing a University of Montana Grizzlies tee-shirt! I know this might seem trivial to you, but believe me, to see a Griz tee-shirt in Springfield, Missouri is nothing short of a miracle. I dont remember exactly, but for some reason I had to run up to the piano, I think it was to grab my notepad. Once there, I could hear a mother encouraging her daughter to come up and ask me something. I looked up and made eye contact with the young girl (she must have been about 11 or 12 years old) and smiled. She approached me with great hesitation. It was when our eyes met that I realized there was something special about this girl, in fact I had a lump in my throat. Why was I feeling so emotional by simply making eye-contact with this young girl? After one more look in her moms direction, she finally asked me, ÒHow do you do it? How do you get up there and sing and play? How do you make it look so easy and natural? Arent you terrified? You look like you enjoy it so much!Ó I was speechlessÑI guess it was in then that I realized I was being asked questions by a younger me. The young girl in front of me was me. I could see the passion in her eyes about music, performing, and expressing herself. But her enthusiasm was coupled by her fear and self-doubt. I giggled to myself because I was so frightfully shy growing up that her questions seemed ironic. Making the transition into a ÒperformerÓ for me has not been easy and was often very uncomfortable. The only thing that has made me a better performer is performing; and is not a skill I have mastered. But I do know that the best thing you can do to perfect your ability to connect with an audience is to get out there and perform. Now what was once a nauseating experience for me is one that cannot come soon enough! The nerves are replaced with excitement and hope. Each show is like a new story that is written as we play along. So many characters and their personas shape the tale--leaving no two shows the same. Okay back to the young girl... The advice I gave this budding artist was to JUST DO IT! Just put your fears aside and do it! I told her that by performing she would eventually replace her feelings of nervousness, embarrassment, and fear with feelings of accomplishment, excitement, and spirit. Her eyes told me she was storing every word I said deep within her. I just hope the encouragement I gave her helps her take risks at a much younger age than me. Out of personal experience, the perfectionist in me kept me from trying so many things...but once I learned to shush her, I started to become more of the person I wanted to be. I left her with a hug. But more importantly, I made her pinky-swear* that she would always keep trying, practicing, and believing. This young musician is on her way to great thingsÑfor believing in yourself is really what it is all about.
I just want her to know that meeting her was one of the most delightful memories I have of this summer tour. I want her to know how thankful I am for the opportunity to meet her. And in a way, meet a younger me. *(You know...instead of handshaking to seal a deal, you clasp your pinky fingers. This is a very special pact!)
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